Category Archives: Books

Smorgasbord Posts from Your Archives – When I Am Not Enough…by Tina Frisco

SALLY CRONIN consistently offers free promotional opportunities on her blog. I recently contributed four articles to her series, Posts from Your Archives.  If you would like to join in, Sally gives directions at the end of each post.
Sharing thoughts and feelings with so many lovely bloggers was a  wonderful experience. Today I’m sharing the fourth and final article I contributed. Find the first three here: 
Problem, Lesson or Opportunity?
Rejection: The Ultimate Teacher
What Is Success?
I’m grateful to Sally for her abiding generosity and for inviting me to participate ❤
*************  Sally Cronin

Welcome to the series where you can share four of your links from your archives here on my blog to a new audience. Perhaps posts that you wrote at the beginning of your blogging experience that deserve another showcase. If you have book promotion posts then please contact me separately for other options. Details of how to get in touch with me at the end of the post.

In the last in Tina Frisco’s series of four posts, she takes us through the process of how we can be our own worst enemies when it comes to putting ourselves down. We all know how negative words can be harmful when used to communicate with others but when we turn them inwards we can do long-term damage to our own belief in who we are.

When I Am Not Enough…by Tina Frisco

Image courtesy of Lucie Stastkova

Throughout our lives, we hear ourselves say:  ‘I’m not that good!’  ‘I’ll never make it.’  ‘I wish I could write that well.’  ‘If only I had said. . .’

Words are powerful. Energy follows thought. The words we speak to ourselves drive our subconscious minds. Diminishing thoughts tell the subconscious we are not enough.

The subconscious mind is self-serving. Its mission is to fulfill our every desire, and it sets in motion the means by which to do so. It takes our words at face value and strives to manifest what they represent. It assumes that what we think and say is what we hope and dream.

How often have we heard ourselves utter, ‘Did I say that’? Unless we are channeling spirit, the mouth speaks what the subconscious mind thinks. If thought rests in the conscious mind, we are aware of it and can choose whether or not to give it a voice. If thought rests in the subconscious mind, we might find ourselves surprised by our own words.

Negative off-hand remarks might seem benign, but they are potent energy viruses that infect the subconscious mind through repetition; repetition which, over time, becomes emphatic. The virulence of this self-denial is potentiated by the subterranean stream of thought that mirrors the spoken word and continues feeding the subconscious. The subconscious then compels us to speak what it believes to be our truth.

This might seem like a vicious cycle that can’t be broken; yet anything is possible, because nothing is set in stone. Even dense matter can be converted to energy.

The way out is the way in.

If we wish to realize our full potential, we need to become witness to ourselves. We must remain alert to and aware of all we manifest in word and deed. And we must do this without judgment.

Labels proclaim. Proclamation reinforces. Reinforcement cements. Cement imprisons.

Your mind is a powerful thing. When you filter it with positive thoughts, your life will start to change. –Buddha

Image courtesy of Lucie Stastkova

In order to build who we wish to be, we first need to become the unbiased observer and witness all we say and do. Notice the patterns. Write them down. Pay attention to the frequency in time and space, i.e., how often we repeat and how much mind space we give these cemented beliefs. This process enlightens us to the being we think we are. It moves the subconscious into the realm of the conscious. Once we become aware of our self-talk, we can make change for the better.

Continue reading … 

Source: Smorgasbord Posts from Your Archives – When I Am Not Enough…by Tina Frisco | Smorgasbord – Variety is the spice of life

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Smorgasbord Posts from Your Archives – What is Success? by Tina Frisco

Along with other fellow bloggers, I’ve been contributing articles to SALLY CRONIN‘s series, Posts from Your Archives. This is my third, and you can read the first and second HERE and HERE. If you would like to join in, Sally gives directions at the end of each post. My thanks to Sally for inviting me to participate and for her ongoing  promotional support ♥  

Sally Cronin

Welcome to the series where you can share four of your links from your archives here on my blog to a new audience. Perhaps posts that you wrote at the beginning of your blogging experience that deserve another showcase. If you have book promotion posts then please contact me separately for other options. Details of how to get in touch with me at the end of the post.

This week Tina Frisco explores our perceptions of Success. Something, as with Happiness we strive to find. The path to success is not all plain sailing and there is a very good reason for that…. discover more in the post.

What is Success by Tina Frisco

Image courtesy of Lucie Stastkova

While writing the introduction to a fellow author’s book, I realized many of us view success as an end-product. We aspire, we strive and, if fortunate, we manifest. Only then do we feel gratified, overlooking all we accomplished in the process. In short, we fail ourselves.

If we become discouraged when met by an obstacle, we are not seeing that obstacle for what it truly is: a teacher. Obstacles not only teach us what does not work, but they also challenge us to reach beyond our perceived limitations. Obstacles are opportunities to practice what we have learned, alter our approach, and move forward. This is success.

Being stuck in obsessive thought patterns, limiting beliefs, or anything that stops us short of reaching a goal can lead to wallowing in the past (nostalgia) and yearning for the future (desire). Turning inward and finding the embedded thoughts sabotaging our efforts keeps us in the present and increases our chances of manifesting our dreams. This is success.

When we look within, we establish a willingness to explore our dark side and discover who we truly are. Throwing caution to the wind and delving into the depths of our psyches allows negative beliefs to surface and be recognized. We then can alter our approach by trying something new. This is success.

An experiential (versus therapeutic) approach to learning offers the highest chance of success, because learning is achieved through experience. Experience involves braving the unknown. The unknown holds all potential for advancement. If we do not commit to success by staying in the present, we could very well achieve bitterness and defeat.

Acknowledging each effective step we take toward realizing our dream is a marked success. In so doing, we achieve much more than the goal itself; we claim each and every one of our efforts as worthy of recognition.

Continue reading … 

Source: Smorgasbord Posts from Your Archives – What is Success? by Tina Frisco | Smorgasbord – Variety is the spice of life

Negative Self-Judgment – Guest post by, Tina Frisco… | Chris The Story Reading Ape’s Blog

Christopher Graham, The Story Reading Ape, is a generous soul who regularly hosts other bloggers. If you’re not familiar with our big-hearted Ape, treat yourself to a plethora of terrific posts by visiting his superb BLOG. I want to thank Chris for his generosity and for featuring my post, which I’d like to share with you now ❤ 
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Photo by Ningren
Image courtesy of Ningren

The people we tend to be hardest on are ourselves. Some folks are an exception to this, but it seems to be true for most of us.

While I was in Pennsylvania helping care for my mother, I fell into judging myself… harshly… a lot.

I should be doing more. I should move back to Pennsylvania in order to help my sisters meet my mother’s needs. I should not feel guilty that my nephew gave up his bed for me and is sleeping on the couch for five weeks. I should not be afraid to drive a (huge) van for the first time in my life, down unfamiliar winding roads, and over freeways and across bridges under construction. I should be able to stick with my dietary regimen and exercise program, even though I am constantly on the go and thoroughly exhausted.

How often do we hear ourselves say, ‘I should’? Have we not been ‘should’ on enough in our lives? What coding is embedded in the human psyche that prompts us to judge our actions, or lack thereof, so harshly?

I think we all know the answer to that question: Guilt.

But from where does guilt derive? How does it become embedded? Is it innate or learned? Unless it is a defensive mechanism all babies are born with, it is learned. So how do we unlearn it? How do we unlearn anything that has become a bad habit? We need to look at what caused the habit to develop in the first place.

Negative messages received in childhood imprint on our psyches. We play these messages over and over in our minds until they are embedded as core beliefs that become self-fulfilling. Thus, our life experiences generally result from what we believe to be true.

Energy follows thought.

It is also important to be cognizant of the pitfalls of perpetuating negative self-judgment. Those pitfalls are the tradeoffs garnered through self-denigration. One example is the ‘poor me’ attitude. This may elicit the treasured attention that was absent in childhood, but it is merely Band-Aid treatment for a fractured psyche.

Once we discover the origin of guilt, we need to recognize it as a mental process conceived of the emotion, fear.

All emotion stems from either LOVE or FEAR.

We might feel guilty, but the truth is we feel afraid – afraid of being disliked, shunned, rejected. As this primordial broth simmers, the subconscious mind attempts to make sense of it and accommodate what it perceives to be our needs.

The subconscious is a servant that takes all we feel at face value.

Photo by Ningren
Image courtesy of Ningren

If we are afraid of something, it infers we must want to defend against it and does all in its power to make this so. In the case of negative self-judgment, it armors us with guilt. However, we oftentimes are not aware of the underlying feeling(s) driving our behavior. Yet guilt will not be denied.

This is a good thing, because . . .

Continue reading … 

Source: Negative Self-Judgment – Guest post by, Tina Frisco… | Chris The Story Reading Ape’s Blog

Guest Post – Tina Frisco on #Forgiveness

Just before I took my blogging break in August, the lovely Debby Gies, aka D.G. Kaye, invited me to guest post on her blog. Debby is the Sherlock Holmes of our blogging community 🙂 Aside from featuring authors, books reviews, and myriad reblogs, she regularly shares tips and tricks she garners from sleuthing. If you’re not familiar with Debby, do yourself a favor and visit her informative BLOG
My thanks to Debby for her abiding generosity and enthusiastic spirit. I was honored and delighted to be her guest, and would like to share that post with you now 
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D.G. Kaye Author

As many of you know, I enjoy sharing posts here by Tina Frisco. And I was elated at Tina’s agreement to write a guest post to feature here today while I’m knee-deep in re-writes on my newest book. Tina has an inner wisdom, which opens our eyes to simple things we often take for granted, or sometimes hold a place within us that we sometimes struggle with but may not be able to come to terms with. In this post, Tina shares her experience with finding forgiveness and methods she utilizes to delve deep within her soul to find resolution.

Author Tina Frisco

Forgiveness

Terri Webster Schrandt
Image courtesy of Terri Webster Schrandt

“We tend to think of the rational as a higher order, but it is the emotional that marks our lives. One often learns more from ten days of agony than from ten years of contentment.” –Merle Shain, Canadian journalist and author, 1935-1989

Forgiveness is the highest form of virtue. It requires a strong and open heart. It challenges faith, trust, and understanding. It demands a willingness to let go of judgment. It moves us into compassion and elevates our consciousness. It fashions a deeper awareness of ourselves and others. Its gift is a more peaceful and fruitful life lived here on Mother Earth.

Forgiving someone a deep hurt is one of the most difficult challenges I have had to face.

As a small child, I was abused and often overlooked in favor of my younger sister. I was an afterthought. Because children have embryonic coping mechanisms, this neglectful behavior by the adults in my life carved a deep hole in my psyche. Desperate to be recognized, I became an overachiever and a slave to codependence. The imperatives of service and recognition fueled my desperation to a point where it imploded. I fragmented, and many took advantage. I was a walking, breathing wound.

In my teenage years, salt was added to that wound by those who mistook my need to help for egoism. Fortunately, I have a strong will and was able to rebut such claims. Unfortunately, this got me nowhere. I was labeled stubborn, angry, selfish, and a know-it-all. I would be the first to volunteer and the last to be selected. No matter how hard I tried, I could not get people to see me.

These labels followed me into early adulthood. Every time my eagerness to serve was mistaken for arrogance or selfishness, I either lashed out or fell into despair. My life had become one of emotional extremes – a roller coaster ride of peaks and valleys, racing fast to stand still.

All of this began to change when, at age thirty-three, I apprenticed to a medicine woman. She was as brutal in pointing out my weaknesses as she was compassionate in acknowledging my strengths. She forced me to dive deep and breathe while in the grasp of fear. Upon surfacing, I saw that all emotion is self-imposed. I alone am responsible for the choices I make. As my awareness grew, I began to own who I am – a wounded warrior made stronger for having faced that which terrorized me.

A few years into my apprenticeship, an issue I thought I had resolved attacked with a sudden and nauseating potency. Once again, and painfully, I felt overlooked. The hurt cut so deep, I nearly lost my life. I thought I was regressing, but I thought wrong. Issues become lighter as they are resolving. The pieces we have dealt with rise toward the surface. The nearer the surface, the more clearly we see them and the more powerful the impact. As these pieces are released, we might feel we are exploding, much like an erupting boil or volcano.

Naively, or perhaps wishfully, I thought I had finally battled this demon for the last time. Again, I thought wrong.

Continue reading … 

Source: Guest post by Tina Frisco – forgiveness

A Distinguished Halloween ~ #ShortStory by #TinaFrisco

If the ancient Celts were alive today, they’d be astounded by what had become of Samhain, one of their most important Sabbats. Both the Roman conquerors and the early Church in England had a hand in eclipsing pagan holidays, by renaming and merging them with their own. You can learn more about the history of Halloween here and hereOne last point before getting on with our story … There’s a difference between a witch and a warlock; and although not gender specific, it is left open to some interpretation. Basically, it’s the difference between light and dark. You can learn more here and here.
The short story I’d like to share with you isn’t about trick-or-treating, pumpkins, or jack-o-lanterns. It’s about the transformation and transmutation of a disagreeable young woman who plays malicious tricks every day of the year. 
A Distinguished Halloween
Pixabay CCO
Pixabay CCO
No one escaped her claws. Everyone felt the hot breath of her rage. She scowled and hissed when met with refusal.
Submit and obey or expect to grovel! Be loyal or be ousted!
Chris stopped at nothing to gratify her perverted ego. She was certain she was entitled.
Her parents cultivated this insufferable attitude by giving her all she ever wanted and catering to her frequent outbursts of teenage angst. Convinced their progeny could do no wrong, they were clueless to having unleashed a monster into the world.
Her teachers wavered between reprimanding and commending, hoping the latter would assuage her obnoxious need for attention and, hopefully, set her on a different path. But she met scolding with insolence and praise with arrogance.
Pixabay CCO
Pixabay CCO
Her friends either idolized her or equaled her repugnance. Those denied entry to her loathsome clique feared for their lives. Notorious for flaunting her superiority, she’d cast an evil sneer, menacing glare, or flip of the hip as she turned her back on the outsiders she detested.
Her most coveted victim was Charlotte, an erudite classmate she secretly envied but openly despised. Her longing for acumen and intellect beyond her potential always evoked contempt when seeing someone with their nose in a book. Yet she abhorred innocence even more.
When a shy naïve country girl transferred in from a rural school, she quickly diverted her attention. She thought the timid and credulous were begging for abuse, and she began a full-scale assault against Becca.
Pixabay CCO
She abhorred the communal nature of holidays. Demonstrations of affection and homage piqued her wrath. Halloween, however, was the one and only exception. It enabled her to fly under the radar, masking all manner of malicious deeds. She intended this Halloween would hallmark the pinnacle of her wickedness.
Her high school’s Distinguished Druid Award was presented to a senior elected by the student body. The school was of Celtic tradition and acknowledged their celebration of the New Year by awarding this honor on Halloween.
She despised award ceremonies and devised a heinous plan to devastate it. She ordered her boyfriend Billy and BFF Sue to nominate Becca. The venomous duo smacked their lips in delight at the prospect of humiliating someone, especially on Halloween; especially if that someone was their worshiped leader’s number one target.
She then commanded her doting coterie to vote for the unsuspecting victim, knowing Becca would be mortified by the mere thought of having to give a speech. Confident her following would obey and Becca would win by a landslide, she wove the threads of her vicious scheme into a nefarious web.

Pixabay CCO

On the eve of nominations, she taped her and Billy’s orgasmic utterances, ensuring they were as offensive as possible. She gave him the tape the following morning and instructed he connect it to the school’s PA system. He was not to listen to it but was to make sure it played when Becca began her speech. He also was to set up the movie screen. Conditioned to blindly obeying orders from his punitive but savory dominatrix, he took the tape without asking a question. She then gave him a peck on the cheek, ushered him to the door, and said not to bother picking her up for the ceremony; she had something she must do beforehand and would meet him there. He left without uttering a word.
As soon as his car pulled away, she jumped into hers and floored it to Tommy’s house, taking care with the precious cargo on her lap. Not only was Billy unaware of the contents of the tape, but he also had no idea she’d videoed their amorous tryst. Tommy was the quintessential techie, and she intended he overlay her and Billy’s faces with that of Becca’s and a nerdy male classmate whom she loathed.
Embroiled in hatred, she sped through a level crossing and into an oncoming train. As she hovered above the wreckage, she howled with laughter at the idiot driver. But she couldn’t hear the sound of her own voice. Bewildered, she looked toward her hands. They were mere diaphanous images. In desperation, she tried to touch her face. She couldn’t feel it. Nor could she pinch herself to make sure she wasn’t dreaming.
Pixabay CCO
Pixabay CCO
Within seconds, a luminous glow appeared before her, seeming to beckon as it gently pulsated. She heard a whispered voice call her name. It urged her to forestall the contemptible plan she’d put in motion, pleading that she not bear the consequences in her next life.
Oh my god I’m dead!
The realization exploded into consciousness and would have paralyzed had she still been mortal. She was the idiot driver!
No! This can’t be happening, dammit! I won’t allow it! 
She tried to scream her thoughts, but she couldn’t speak.
The soft light continued to pulsate as her fear materialized and drifted before her. The dark menace glowered and dared her to fight – fight her fear, or fight the gentle voice. As the threat inflamed her awareness, she recognized the ugly creature she’d become.
Pixabay CCO
Pixabay CCO
She recalled the small child she once was, fists held tight against a multitude of sexual abuse. She wanted to hug the child and tell her everything would be all right. In that moment of recognition, the grotesque shape burst and shattered into pieces, each one hissing as it caught fire and fizzled from sight. She now knew what she must do.
Her thoughts turned to Billy. Instantly she was in the school auditorium. She liked that she could travel to where her thoughts focused. Billy looked so handsome, and she wished she could hug him. This surprised her, because she’d always thought hugs were for dorks. She regretted how utterly foolish she’d been.
Her classmates were in their Celtic attire, looking excited and happy. She’d missed that joyful feeling and wished she could right the wrong she’d done in trying to crush it in others. Delighting in watching everyone gather, she began to feel something familiar – something she hadn’t felt for a very long time – something she remembered as love.
Billy stood on the backstage catwalk, fiddling with equipment. She called to him, but he didn’t respond. She grabbed at his arm, but her hand passed through it. He neither heard nor saw her.
Pixabay CCO
Pixabay CCO
Desperate to stop him from executing her villainous plan, she racked her brain for ideas. As they flooded her mind, she realized that the help she sought – both now and in her past life – was there for the asking. A surge of energy swelled and electrified her spirit. She directed it toward the electronics, intent on making them malfunction.
Billy had set up the movie screen and was now preparing the audio equipment to operate remotely. He pressed the pause and play buttons simultaneously, but they wouldn’t engage. He tried time and again, rechecking all wiring and connections, but nothing worked. Biting his bottom lip, he glanced back and forth between the offstage wings. She knew he was looking for her and hoping he could get the device functioning before she arrived. He didn’t relish the thought of facing her fury. But after a few more attempts, he gave up. Head down and shoulders slumped, he started for the auditorium anteroom, shuffling his feet.
Sue snagged him at the door, licking her lips in fiendish pleasure. She’d just finished counting the votes; Becca won, nearly unrivaled. When Billy told her about the audio problem, she turned toward the stage, insisting they go back up and try again. He straightened his back, grabbed her by the arm, and, for the first time in four years, said NO to his girlfriend’s BFF. Sue tried to pull away, but he held tight and forced her to go with him. Her mouth fell open at his defiance. So did his when he realized what he’d done. Just as he was about to give it a second thought, music for the opening ceremony began to play. It was too late to change his mind.
Pixabay CCO
Pixabay CCO
Boyfriend and BFF fidgeted in their seats, throwing cursory glances at the door as they anxiously awaited the late arrival of their merciless leader. Becca tripped on her way to the podium, as well as over a few words; but none were the result of outside influences. This was fortunate, because she could move objects with her mind. She surely would have focused on the movie screen and exits, extinguishing all with the rage ignited by her humiliation.
But the equipment didn’t burst into flames, catch the heavy stage drapes, travel along the wiring to the back speakers, and set the auditorium ablaze. The doors didn’t slam shut, seal in billowing smoke, and force frantic captives to gag and wheeze as they gasped for their last breath.
No. None of this occurred. Instead, everyone applauded Becca, and all lived to enjoy their Halloween festivities. No one knew they’d escaped an inferno. No one knew Becca Carrie White had telekinetic powers. No one, that is, except Chris. And she wasn’t talking.
Pixabay CCO
Pixabay CCO

© Tina Frisco 2017

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Happy Halloween, everyone!
Here’s a little treat 😊 
A Telekinetic Surprise in a Coffee Shop
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VlOxlSOr3_M

#BookRelease: What’s in a Name? Vols. 1 and 2 by Sally Cronin ~ Print Version

I am pleased to join Sally Cronin in announcing the publication of the two-volume print version of her book, What’s in a Name. Those of you familiar with Sally know her as an avid supporter of her fellow bloggers, consistently promoting our artistic endeavors on her outstanding blog magazine, Smorgasbord Invitation. If you’re not familiar with Sally, do visit and follow her blog. As the title Smorgasbord implies, there’s something for everyone ~ health, food, books, music, humor, life in general. And now, over to Sally to tell you about her new book … 

Sally Cronin

What’s in a Name is a collection of short stories across two volumes, about the influence our given names can have on our lives. Those names may have previously belonged to the famous and brave, a loved family member, or picked out of a hat by our parents. But they all have one thing in common. They are with us from birth until the grave and they are how we are remembered by those we meet.

What's in a Name Vols. 1 & 2 by Sally Cronin

Buy the book HERE

Both these short story collections have been brought together in one print copy. Currently available only in the UK and Ireland. Both volumes are available separately in eBook version.

What’s in a Name Volume One

What's in a Name Vol. 1 by Sally Cronin

Buy the book here:  Amazon UK  Amazon US

There are names that have been passed down through thousands of years which have powerful and deep-rooted meaning to their bearers. Other names have been adopted from other languages, cultures and from the big screen. They all have one thing in common. They are with us from birth until the grave and they are how we are known to everyone that we meet.

There are classical names such as Adam, David and Sarah that will grace millions of babies in the future. There are also names that parents have invented or borrowed from places or events in their lives which may last just one lifetime or may become the classic names of tomorrow.  

What’s in a Name Volume Two

What's in a Name Vol. 2 by Sally Cronin

Buy the book here:  Amazon UK  Amazon US

Our legacy is not always about money or fame, but rather in the way that people remember our name after we have gone. In these sixteen short stories we discover the reasons why special men and women will stay in the hearts and minds of those who have met them. Romance, revenge and sacrifice all play their part in the lives of these characters.

Kenneth watches the love of his life dance on New Year’s Eve while Lily plants very special flowers every spring for her father. Martha helps out a work colleague as Norman steps back out into the world to make a difference. Owen brings light into a house and Patrick risks his life in the skies over Britain and holds back from telling a beautiful redhead that he loves her.

In one way or another all these characters will be remembered by those whose lives they have touched.

One of the reviews for Volume Two of What’s in a Name

One of my most FAVORITE reads of 2017 By Carmen Stefanescu on September 5, 2017

It is the first fiction book written by Sally Cronin that I’ve had the opportunity to read. I was drawn into What’s in a Name collection and went on reading until the last story was done. I would call most of them “tales with a twist.” I really did enjoy this book…you may need some tissue at times. You will love the unexpected and won’t think to put the book down. I found it hard to put down

The motives and emotions of the characters in all of the stories were well defined and expressed. I really liked the fact that each story came to a satisfying ending and the next story quickly engaged me with the new people and place. It’s undoubtedly one of my most FAVORITE reads of 2017, in my TOP 5. Sally Cronin creates stories that will keep you flipping pages and loving it!

I won’t tell you what they are about because being short stories I would reveal important details and I want other readers to live themselves the emotions I experienced. What I can tell you is that each story is as touching and compelling as the next one. The thread that links them all stories or characters is sacrifice and romance. Children, parents, lovers, life being lived.

These stories are for me like a fragrant flowers bouquet, each flower having its own special color and scent.

If you are short on time, What’s in a Name allows you to read something start to finish, which I love. Great for airplanes or a one hour mental break, beside being just great for personal “escape from the world.”

Also by Sally Cronin

Books by Sally Cronin

All books available at  Amazon US  and  Amazon UK
About Sally Cronin

I have been a storyteller most of my life (my mother called them fibs!). Poetry, song lyrics and short stories were left behind when work and life intruded, but that all changed in 1996. My first book Size Matters was a health and weight loss book based on my own experiences of losing 70kilo. I have written another ten books since then on health and also fiction including three collections of short stories. I am an indie author and proud to be one. My greatest pleasure comes from those readers who enjoy my take on health, characters and twisted endings… and of course come back for more.

Learn more about Sally:  Blog   Goodreads   Twitter  Facebook   Amazon US   Amazon UK 

Smorgasbord – Posts from Your Archives – Rejection: the Ultimate Teacher by Tina Frisco | Smorgasbord – Variety is the spice of life

Sally Cronin has graciously invited her followers to share four posts from their archives. This is my second one in the series; you can read the first one HERE. Directions on how to participate are given at the end of each post. Thank you to Sally for the abiding generosity and support she offers our community ♥ 
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Welcome to the series where you can share four of your links from your archives here on my blog to a new audience. Perhaps posts that you wrote at the beginning of your blogging experience that deserve another showcase. If you have book promotion posts then please contact me separately for other options. Details of how to get in touch with me at the end of the post.

Today Tina Frisco puts a different spin on rejection. It is rare for anyone to go through their lives without some form of this hurtful action from others. Tina however looks at this as an opportunity to grow and evolve as a person.

Rejection: the Ultimate Teacher by Tina Frisco

Countess Lucie Stastkova
Image Courtsy of Lucie Stastkova

Rejection comes in many forms, from many places, and is very painful. What makes rejection so devastating? What causes us to react in a particular way? How can we use rejection to our advantage?

On a purely instinctual level, rejection threatens to extinguish our life force by depriving us of vital nourishment. No being can truly thrive without some measure of love and acceptance.

Rejection devastates when we attach our personal worth to someone or something outside of ourselves. Feeling worthy only when liked and accepted by those with whom we engage sets the stage for rejection.

When feeling disliked or ignored by another, it is wise to step back and view that person’s behavior as a mirror of our own subconscious mind. Often the things we do not like in ourselves are reflected back to us by others, giving us an opportunity to examine what prompts us to react and how we might change. This not only buffers the impact, but also opens the door to personal growth. Becoming the witness rather than the victim allows us to determine if our behavior rather than our essence is being rejected, or if the other person’s bias is in play, and/or if we simply are misreading all the cues.

Behavior learned throughout childhood is largely determined within the context of the example set by the adults in our lives. When we incarnate, we become blank slates to be imprinted upon by everyone and everything around us. We react to external stimuli positively or negatively, based on whether our basic needs are met or neglected. As we mature, we learn we have choices. Those choices include how we feel and whether we react to or act on those feelings.

The key to using rejection to our advantage lies in remaining objective. However, behaving as an unattached witness can be difficult when our impulse is either to strike or withdraw. If we recognize impulse as being instinctual – a reflex action rather than a thought process – then we are taking a first step toward understanding our feelings and turning rejection into a positive learning experience.

When observing animals in the wild, it becomes clear that instinct is, in part, a survival mechanism. Although we humans do not live in the wild, we find it impossible at times not to react. Generally speaking, however, our survival does not depend on ‘fight or flee.’ Most often we have the advantage of time and space within which to consider our options and teach ourselves to behave differently. We are capable of changing our behavior and, quite possibly, our feelings. With a little practice, we can move ourselves to the threshold of choice: act or react. Success in achieving this pivots on focusing our intention.

Change occurs in three stages: (1) we witness our behavior after we have reacted; (2) we take note while we are reacting; (3) we stop ourselves before we react. When we reach the final stage, our behavior reflects choice (act on) rather than reflex (react to). Since most change occurs over time, perseverance becomes vital to success. Yet once we are rooted in firm resolve, observing ourselves can be fascinating.

Continue reading . . . 

 

Source: Smorgasbord – Posts from Your Archives – Rejection: the Ultimate Teacher by Tina Frisco | Smorgasbord – Variety is the spice of life

Welcome Back #Author Andrew Joyce

I’m thrilled to welcome author Andrew Joyce back to my blog. Andrew recently released his short story collection, Bedtime Stories for Grown-Ups, and I’m pleased to help him promote it. 

Bedtime Stories for Grown-Ups by Andrew Joyce

Buy the book HERE

BLURB

Bedtime Stories for Grown-Ups is a jumble of genres—seven hundred pages of fiction and nonfiction … some stories included against the author’s better judgment. If he had known that one day they’d be published, he might not have been as honest when describing his past. Here is a tome of true stories about the author’s criminal and misspent youth, historical accounts of the United States when She was young, and tales of imagination encompassing every conceivable variety—all presented as though the author is sitting next to you at a bar and you’re buying the drinks as long as he keeps coming up with captivating stories to hold your interest.

Comprised of 218,000 words, you’ll have plenty to read for the foreseeable future. This is a book to have on your night table, to sample a story each night before extinguishing the lights and drifting off to a restful sleep.

Mr. Joyce sincerely hopes that you will enjoy his stories because, as he has stated, “It took a lot of living to come up with the material for some of them.”

BIO

Andrew Joyce left high school at seventeen to hitchhike throughout the US, Canada, and Mexico. He wouldn’t return from his journey until years later when he decided to become a writer. Joyce has written five books. His first novel, Redemption: The Further Adventures of Huck Finn and Tom Sawyer, was awarded the Editors’ Choice Award for Best Western of 2013. A subsequent novel, Yellow Hair, received the Book of the Year award from Just Reviews and Best Historical Fiction of 2016 from Colleen’s Book Reviews.

Joyce now lives aboard a boat in Fort Lauderdale, Florida, with his dog, Danny, where he is busy working on his next book, tentatively entitled, Mahoney: An American Story.

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You’ll be delighted to know that Andrew brought Danny along (actually, I think it’s the other way around 🙂 ). We’ve missed you, Danny!

Danny the Dog

And now, over to Andrew and Danny … 
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Hello, my name is Andrew Joyce. I’m here today to try to sell a few books. I have a new book out entitled Bedtime Stories for Grown-Ups. And I thought it might help if I brought my dog along because he’s a bit more articulate than I am. We’re here to discuss a few of our favorite things. But first, I’d like to introduce you to Danny the Dog.
Say hello, Danny.
Hello.
Could you be a bit more enthusiastic?
Could you get on with it? You dragged me away from a Lassie rerun. She was just about to save Timmy, who fell into a well. I wanted to see how she was gonna do it, seeing as she has no opposable thumbs. You never know, I might have to save you from a well someday. Then you’ll be sorry you didn’t let me finish watching my show.
Okay. Let’s just get down to it. I’ll say my favorite things first and then you can tell the nice people about your favorite things.
Why do you get to go first?
It really doesn’t matter to me, Danny. Do you want to go first?
No.
Boy, oh boy! You are something else. I’m sorry, folks, but Danny seems to be in a mood today. I’ll start the ball rolling by telling you some of my favorite things.
Make sure they’re not too sappy.
Be quiet, Danny. Okay, here goes. I like getting up early to see the sun rise out of the ocean. I like rainy days when I can stay inside and read a good book. I like a good cup of coffee, and happy endings in movies. Now it’s your turn, Danny.
Whoa! Are you kidding me? What are you trying to do, fool these poor people? I’ll tell ’em what you really like.
No need to do that, Danny. I’m just trying to sell some books here.
Hush. If you want to sell books, then be honest with the people. It’s my turn and I’ll use it to tell the people what you’re really like. Andrew’s favorite thing is vodka. Then there’s his obsession with beer. You should see him when he has a snootful. He’s just like Hemingway. I don’t mean he can write like Hemingway, but he sure can drink like him.
Thanks a lot, Danny.
I’m not done yet. Sunrises? Andrew hasn’t seen a sunrise since I was a pup. And coffee? Of course, he loves coffee. He puts three shots of vodka in every cup. I will admit he does read a lot, rain or shine.
You are a bad doggie, Danny. Alright, you blew my cover, but we still haven’t heard about your favorite things.
I thought you’d never ask. I love to sniff where other dogs have peed. I love our walks in the morning when it’s just the two of us. I love it when, after our walks, you give me those treats. But do you want to know what I love the most?
I’m afraid to ask.
I love you. I’m hard on you because I’m trying to keep you on the straight and narrow. An impossible task, I think. But I’ll keep trying.
Aww shucks, Danny.
Can we get out of here now? There’s an old Rin Tin Tin movie on TCM that I don’t want to miss.
Sure, Danny. Let me just thank Tina for having us over.
Thank her for me too. It wasn’t so bad.
Thank you, Tina. 
You’re most welcome, my friends! It was my pleasure to host the dynamic duo of the blogosphere 🙂 
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I hope you enjoyed visiting with Andrew and Danny. You’ll find Andrew’s other books HEREBooks by Andrew Joyce
Learn more about Andrew and Danny, and be sure to get your copy of Bedtime Stories for Grown-Ups
Website   Blog   Amazon   Facebook   Danny the Dog   Twitter   
Thanks so much for stopping by 

Posts from Your Archives – Problem, Lesson or Opportunity by Tina Frisco

Sally Cronin is graciously hosting me and other authors on her blog series, Posts from Your Archives. Sally is multi-talented and administers a blog that exemplifies her character: Smorgasbord Invitation. If you’re not familiar with Sally, do yourself a favor and rectify that! Her blog is highly #recommended

Smorgasbord - Variety is the spice of life

Welcome to the series where you can share four of your links from your archives here on my blog to a new audience. Perhaps posts that you wrote at the beginning of your blogging experience that deserve another showcase. If you have book promotion posts then please contact me separately for other options. Details of how to get in touch with me at the end of the post.

Today I am delighted to welcome Tina Frisco to the series with the first of her four blog posts. We would not be human if we did not face problems in our lives. Not just the minor daily issues that we deal with as routine, but the kind of problems that are possibly life changing, life threatening or impact more than just ourselves. It is easy to get into a tail spin especially if others are depending on us to find a…

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#Book #Review ~ #AnnetteRochelleAben

Annette Rochelle Aben

On September 25, 2017, Annette Rochelle Aben announced on her BLOG that she would like reviews of her books as a gift for her birthday, which is October 25th. She began a month-long PARTY and set up a delightful soup and beverage bar on October 11th. 

Annette is an inspiration for so many of us. To show my gratitude for her abiding love and friendship, I read and reviewed two of her books: Go You and Angel Messages: A Wing and a Prayer

Visit Annette’s Amazon Author Page by clicking on the image below. 

Annette Rochelle Aben's Books

Annette’s books affirm the positive and move us into feeling grateful for all we have been given in life. I am so pleased to share my reviews with you now. 

Happy Birthday, Annette! 

Angel Messages: A Wing and a Prayer
My 5-Star Review

You Are Not Alone

I have always believed in Angels and have read several books about them. What strikes me most about Annette Rochelle Aben’s book, Angel Messages: A Wing and a Prayer, is the open heart from which she writes.

Ms. Aben shares her personal experiences by sprinkling the Angel messages she has received, between passages of her own lovely poetry.

Two of my favorite messages are: 1. Be in love with the gift of your life. Your joy colors your world; 2. Choosing love will always bless you. The answers are in your heart. 

Ms. Aben states that Angels may materialize in the guise of ‘just plain folks.’ I think we all experience this yet often overlook, for example, the woman who gives us the extra change we need to make a purchase, or the man who extends a hand to help us onto the bus.

Whether you believe in Angels as heavenly beings, visitors from the cosmos, or just plain folks, this book will touch that place in you that searches for comfort, assurance, and a positive outlook on life.

Go You
My 5-Star Review

I Know I Can!

Although only fifty-three pages in length, Annette Rochelle Aben’s book, Go You, packs a mighty punch. Filled with positive affirmations, it offers the reader the potential to secure a favorable outcome from myriad life experiences.

Ms. Aben believes in the power of the positive and in paying it forward. She reinforces these beliefs by giving herself a pep talk every time she looks in the mirror. What a fabulous world we would live in if everyone practiced this!

The next time you catch a glimpse of yourself, look into your eyes and say: “You are special! You are appreciated! You are the better half of the whole! GO YOU!!” Or: “You are worth protecting! You are worth supporting! You are worth loving! GO YOU!!”

The author ends the book by asking: “Now, what would YOU like to say to yourself?” This question rests atop a lined page that is blank, prepared for us to affirm our positive thoughts and aspirations.

I smiled when I read the title of this book. By the time I finished reading it, I was ready to take on the world. You will be, too.